so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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