Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Randomize
