i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
So many bounce houses so little time
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Randomize
