That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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