Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
Randomize
