Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
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