just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
As shirtless as possible
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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