She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
