dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
