No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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