She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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