Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
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