I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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