So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
