You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Randomize
