Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
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