i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
I'm bleeding and have questions
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
