how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
two words...techno handjob
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
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