So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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