so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
