Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Randomize
