maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Randomize