there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
