It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
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