My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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