if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Randomize
