i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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