I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
