so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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