so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Randomize