Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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