i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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