I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
