Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Randomize
