idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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