remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize