I am puke
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
He shit in the fireplace
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
