My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
