is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
