bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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