a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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