But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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