White coat. Heels.
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
