i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
Randomize
