To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
