For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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