You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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