fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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