Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
