I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
